Missing food

Here's the link for "Beauty Redefined." BEAUTY REDEFINED- FIGHT THE MEDIA! Hope you can take a minute to read this website for your "challenge" for the day.

I am going to get something off my chest right now. I miss oatmeal. I miss berries. I miss whole wheat bread. I miss watermelon. I miss yogurt.

I am all on board for another month or two of medifast but I am S*T*R*U*G*G*L*I*N*G. I am not necessarily struggling with bingeing or cheating these days. I just miss wholesome delicious food. I really feel like I've been retrained in so many ways and that when I return to eating like a normal person, I will have so many better habits in place. I could go on and on about what habits I have developed but mostly I just feel like I am in control of the food 99.9% of the time.

I will always have my moments. I will always have times when I lose control and eat in a way that makes me feel full. I will always have certain foods I have to be strong around. These are simple facts I've had to accept.

The things that I have to worry about now are the reasons I eat what I do. The reason I feel guilty for eating certain foods isn't necessarily because I think that food is BAD. I have discovered that I feel guilty when I know I used food as a drug and the food was in control of me. I feel pretty on top of this weakness and have been making peace with myself over this for several months now. The behavior I care most about is my emotional eating.

I believe in eating wholesome, nutritious, natural food. I miss it! I miss oatmeal and blueberries.

I have said from the beginning this medifast thing is a means to an end and I owe it to helping me get a pretty big chunk of weight off. I have come to the conclusion that my body is one slow moving vehicle that cannot be rushed. I cannot force weight off. I cannot trick my body. It will do what it wants to do. All I have to do is be patient. I know there are many diets and eating plans to help a person lose weight but ultimately once the diet is over, you're doomed if you go back to your old eating habits.

I am not saying I'm going to go backwards and throw myself into binge eating and all those other habits I've worked so hard to overcome. All I'm saying is that I really miss chewing my food and preparing my food and having a variety of whole foods in my diet. I get plenty of veggies and protein but it's been a long time since I've had REAL oatmeal for breakfast.

The week of eating out was awesome. I loved having some "real" food. I've been on and off the program for a few weeks now and man, it's so hard to go back to such a restrictive program when I feel ready to be eating in a very nutritious way. Another month and a half and I'm set. I've had a good little break and now I can see the light at the end of the tunnel and I'm going forward to get past this little slump I've been in. I think I have weighed in the 201 neighborhood for like a month now! Up a little, down a little, up a little, down a little. It's time to go down...and down...and down...a little at a time.

Ok, that feels better. I've gotten it all off my chest. On another happy note, my pharmacist totally gave me unsolicited sympathy for having Hashimoto's! I was asking him about the best time to take my medicine and told him I have Hashimoto's so my dosage gets changed a lot plus I'm trying to lose the weight I've gained and want to be super on top of my meds and he was like, man, that is rough, it takes a long time to burn all the weight off with Hashimoto's. I was like, TELL ME ABOUT IT!!! It validates me that I have a disease. I think I'm still in denial about that at times, ok, yeah. Totally in denial about it.  Oh well, I've been working on my recipe blog all day since I'm home in bed with a horrible sinus infection and cold. It's still a little bitty baby blog with hardly any pictures of the food...but you can look if you want!
Part time hippy, full time foodie