Validation

I had the best Friday night ever. I hung out with my old friend from my childhood who grew up across the street from me and we had a blast. We made a delicious dessert that I have wanted to try for a long time and I made sure to leave it ALL at her house so I didn't bring it home with me.

Her roommate is a nurse and of course our girl talk made its way to the topic of weight and appearances (not that being a nurse has any relationship to those topics of conversation)

I was lamenting about my weight issues and how it's so difficult to stay committed and motivated when I just never really seem to see results unless I'm barely subsisting on 800 calories a day and even then they are mediocre.

She was asking lots of questions and seemed so baffled at my journey. I told her what I had tried, what my weaknesses are, what has worked in the past, and how lately I just feel so hopeless about ever losing weight.

I am by no means perfect at dieting or exercising. I'm sure there are others out there who are more committed than me. I can say that when I'm "in the zone" and really committed to WHATEVER it is I'm trying for the month or 90 days, I am pretty hardcore about it. I can go for weeks without cheating too much and I would like to think I've put in really committed efforts during the last 2.5 years.

It was validating to have someone in the medical profession confused by me again! It's strangely validating to be asked how I continue to even work out and eat healthy and TRY to lose weight when my results are so, well, non-existent.

I'm really hoping that the continual energy work I have done will help iron out whatever else is going on in my body physically and emotionally. I really think that over time, this will be an important part of my journey and finding success!

I am still making progress with P90x2 and I just started my second phase.

Holy smokes is this program putting me in my place! I'll take a video sometime of the moves I attempt for your viewing pleasure. It's pretty sad actually. To give you a visual, imagine me trying to balance with my legs on a fit ball while trying to do push ups on a medicine ball. Yeah, a lot of wiggling and falling off into my living room furniture. I might need a helmet and full body armor to get through this next series!

I've really enjoyed centering my meals around whatever I get in my bountiful baskets each week and feeling like I am eating a very nutrient rich diet with little to no processed foods. I haven't really re-introduced bread, oatmeal, and other grains into my diet, but I've lightened up a little bit and I've had a little cheese here and there, and I had some dessert and french fries on Friday. No biggie.

I'm really trying to stick to the 80/20 rule with my eating and that way I don't go insane. Hopefully this will help me avoid another "shame spiral week" after my frustration with lack of results.

Here's to a week of positive thinking!